Thinking for a change

May 8, 2012

When I was asked to be one of the speakers for the Chick Fil A Leadercast last Friday I was to say the least humbled. To be in front of my peers and to follow some of the greatest minds that I know is a bit, shall we say intimidating?

Then when I got the schedule and saw that I followed Marcus Buckingham….hmmmm

But after I stopped and got my breath I thought for a minute, ROBIN “what is your mission or purpose in life?” and the answer is to add value to people and to be a constant learner so that I can be the best wife, mother, friend and coach that I can possibly be.  Doesn’t it make sense that Marcus Buckingham, and these other great thinkers started somewhere too? Of course the answer is yes so here we are. So I want to thank you for indulging me on my joueney.

The premise of my talk revolved around THINKING FOR A CHANGE

When I first picked up Johns book by the same title I looked at it like, Well maybe for once in my life I should actually think. Now that would be a change. As I look at it now I have decided that I am thinking for a change or to cause change.

What I have learned is that the quality of my life is determined by the quality of the questions that I am willing to ask myself.

Now, I hate to admit it but there have been times in my life when my questions have been pretty shallow! In fact I ‘m going to guess that there were times where the people  around me were probably pretty frustrated by it.

But the more that I surrounded myself with leaders the deeper my thinking becomes and the more my life changes.

I started reading good books, listening to thought provoking cds. I simply couldn’t get enough. Still can’t

I have been a faithful follower of John Maxwell for probably close to 20 years.  He wrote a book called failing  forward that he recommended that I have my kids read, Now I’m not sure they ever read it but I sure did and I know that it made me a better parent because it changed the way that I look at failure or growth.

Have you ever had a time in your life when you were feeling really great and then life, or someone in your life starts to question you? Like who do you think you are? That’s ok for them but not for you?

Perhaps it was YOU asking YOU those questions. Your just a small time girl with a high school education, you could never be do or have what those people have, DREAM ON

Well I have been there more than once in my life.

Fast forward 25 years to today. My life and my mindset are very different.  I  surround myself with great people and put great things in I have changed my perspective and therefore my world. . .

Don’t get me wrong, it’s far from perfect, I still struggle and when I get there I bring people around me that I know will help me raise the level of my thoughts. I listen to more things that will help me to shift. I read 3 or more books at a time. The down side to that is I sometimes create this book that exists only in my mind but what the heck right??

And at times it isn’t very easy to shift!

Do you know what most people’s number one challenge is when it comes to making positive personal changes? It’s their feelings. They want to change but they don’t know how to get past their emotions.

Therefore they stay stuck. They continue to look to some outside influence that will cause them to do life differently. Like a magic pill or pixy dust.  They go to a great seminar like today and they get motivated and then they stay excited for a few days and then they start all over again. I know because I have been there. I still visit it once in a while

The sooner we can identify what we want and get it from our head to our heart, real change can happen.

So how do we do it?

What if we look at it this way.

I can control my thoughts

My feelings come from my thoughts

I can control my feelings by controlling my thoughts.

So if you are willing to change your thinking, you can change your feelings. If you change your feelings you will change your actions and based on GOOD thinking you can change your life.

Well with that being said, where do you begin? Educators would have you believe that good grades lead to a better life, and that the more formal education that you have the more successful you will be. Don’t get me wrong, education is important but the problem with most educational institutions is that they try to teach us what to think instead of how to think. We have to learn how to think well to achieve our dreams and to reach our full potential.

Author James Allen believed, “You will become as small as your controlling desire, as great as your dominant aspiration.” Or as King Solomon said “As people think in their hearts, so they are”

So what do you think in your heart? If what you think currently is not creating the life that you desire what can you do to change that? If you are not sure what is in your heart all you need to do is look at your behavior.

95% of achieving anything is knowing what you want and paying the price to get it.

Sometimes we are fortunate enough to have people in our lives that are willing to support us in our journey. They stop us and ask us the questions that give us the clarity necessary in our lives to live our dreams. IF we will take the time to truly answer those questions. I have been blessed to have many people that have done that for me.

I would like to do something for you.  Would it be ok if I share these questions with you?

first step is to define your reality.

Where are you now? Really be honest with yourself, no-one needs to see this other than you. You are where you are because of the choices that you have made or that you have allowed others to make for you.

What do you want? If time and money were no object, what would you do? Where would you go? If you were to live the life of your dreams, what does it look like?

When do you want it? I believe that we do have an expiration date. The problem is that  it’s not stamped on us so we just don’t know when it is. How will you live each day to it’s fullest?

How will you know that you have it? How many times have you said “I wish I knew then what I know now?”  ”If only I had…” When opportunity comes we need to recognize it.

When you get what you want. What else in your life will improve?

What sources do you have available to help you with this?

How can you best utilize the resources that you have?

What are you going to begin doing now to get what you want?

Who will you get to support you in  it?

As you go through this process I just ask that you remember one thing.

This is a JOURNEY. To get from point A to point B there will be challenges. What if we were to look at those challenges differently? What if instead of looking at our choices as good or bad or right or wrong. What if we looked at them as effective or ineffective? Either creating the desired result or not? And then from this new perspective you give yourselves the freedom to then make a new choice?

How liberating that can be.

So I hope that you will take the time to ponder these questions for yourself and perhaps someday if there is value to you, pass them on to someone that you care about.

In closing I would like to share something form John Maxwell,

As you begin changing your thinking, start immediately to change your  behavior. Begin to act the part of the person you want to become.

Take action on your behavior. Too many people want to feel, then take action. This never works.


AH, The simple smile!

March 2, 2011

There is so much going on these days and the constant tug on my time and energy seems never ending. I must admit that when I was asked by my coach today…
“are you ready for a new challenge” my heart sank and I had to dig deep. (and if I were to be truly honest, I really wasn’t sure if I was) You should hear some of the challenges that he gives me!
I stepped up and took the challenge anyway because I don’t want to be ordinary or just good enough. So I got my breath and said YES! I am ready for the challenge. So he threw it out there. My coach knows that right now I am struggle with NOT ENOUGH TIME to get it all done and to be all to all. So the challenge that he gave me was to go out and to connect with 10 people today through a smile! Sounds like a pretty simple challenge right? This time I decided that they needed to be people that I don’t know so I went to the grocery store and walked around until I felt like I truly connected with 10 people. It was quite the experience and I am going to suggest that you do it as well. my energy has increased ten fold.
What difference can we make in our lives and the lives of others when we just take a moment to connect?
I would love to hear how you are impacted by a simple smile.
You are a blessing,


October 7, 2010

Yesterday I threw my back out and it has been a frustrating two days to say the least! The good thing that has come of this is that it has given me a chance to slow down a little in that, Well, I have a very difficult time just walking. (I know, I’m getting older) I was even watching some show on TV last night that I have never seen before and she was talking about getting older and she threw her back out. She even did it doing something pretty close to how I did it. Yes, it was a daring feat, I was running my bath water. You heard me, running the bath water!! How ridiculous is that? I wanted to say that it was something exciting and adventurous but that was not the case. Being the winner that I am I decided to go to the office anyway. I had the great fortune of not getting better but getting worse. So much so that I had to be wheeled to the car in an office chair. It was hilarious to say the least. At least I have a sense of humor right?

I saw the Chiropractor two days in a row and I will see him again tomorrow and hopefully I will be back on my feet again. If you need a great Chiropractor you should give him a call. His name is Dr. Lance Casazza and he is very good at what he does. He wrote a book as well that I know you will enjoy. It’s called be the hammer not the nail and it’s dead on.

Well, as I sit this evening reflecting I came across this on my computer, Who knows when and where I wrote or found it but it hit home for me today and wanted to share it so here it is.

I hope it impacts your life in some way and causes you to see the winner in yourself and those around you.

WINNERS take chances. Like everyone else, they fear failing, but they refuse to let fear control them. WINNERS don’t give up. When life gets tough, they hang in until the going gets better. WINNERS are flexible. They realize there is more than one way to get what they want and they are willing to try them all. WINNERS know they are not perfect. They respect their weaknesses while making the most of their strengths. WINNERS fall, but they don’t stay down. They stubbornly refuse to let a fall keep them from climbing. WINNERS don’t blame fate for their failures, nor luck for their successes. Winners accept responsibility for their lives. WINNERS are positive thinkers who see good in all things. From the ordinary, they make the extraordinary. WINNERS believe in the path they have chosen even when it’s hard, even when others can’t see where they are going. WINNERS are patient. They know a goal is only as worthy as the effort that’s required to achieve it. Winners come in all shapes and sizes from the small child to the 100 year old adult. I have been blessed to be surrounded by many winners in my life. Or is it that I choose to surround myself with this type of person? Whatever the case may be, I am happy to be surrounded and supported by so many winners!

For your safety

September 28, 2010

I just read a tragic article posted on Inman News about two Ohio Realtors that were killed when showing vacant homes. It brings me back to something that I talk to agents about all of the time. In fact I had this very conversation today! Not being killed necessarily but the safety issue of taking a sign call and just jumping in the car to meet a virtual stranger to show them a home.
Please know that I am not saying that these two agents did anything wrong nor am I suggesting that they did not follow safety rules to protect themselves. What I am saying is that I know that I myself have gone to a home to meet with a potential buyer that I did not know and what has happened to these two people could have been me.
In this ever changing market I understand the desire to offer what we see as the best possible service and to be the first agent to meet with the client to show them a home. That is what they want anyway isn’t it? They want to see and then purchase a home. How do we as Realtors provide that service while still meeting the needs of our clients?
It all begins with standards and expectations. Seriously, would you use a surgeon that will come directly to you and perform a surgery on your terms at the location determined by you? Of course not!! I know what you are thinking, Robin this is not surgery and there is no comparison. Maybe there is. We are professionals and we must do everything that we can to protect ourselves as best we can while at the same time meeting customer care standards.
When we are able to articulate the value to the client for meeting first we can actually save them time in the long run while meeting our goals as well. When we do this we are actually in a position to provide a much higher level of service and we know that we have a legitimate client. (let’s face it, someone who is looking to do you harm will not meet you at the office first will they)?
All I ask is that we do what we can to protect ourselves every day while offering the best possible service to our clients providing a WIN-WIN relationship.
My heart goes out to the family and loved ones of these two agents.

What comes first, the attitude or the action?

September 1, 2010

What comes first? The action or the attitude?
It’s almost like the chicken and the egg conversation isn’t it? And yet the way that you think about that question can have a profound effect on your success in business and in life. You have to have both to achieve sustainable success. Having one without the other will only allow you to achieve a mild level of success. Having both will enable you to accomplish anything!
If you have the right attitude but don’t take the correct actions, you will receive limited results. If you have the right actions but have the wrong attitude, again you will receive marginal results. Only by having both will you fulfill your full potential. So what is it for you? Does your attitude influence your actions or is it the other way around? Stop and answer that question right now. Sometimes we think it’s one way and yet the people around us may say we show up differently. With that in mind you may want to make sure that you are showing up to others in your life the way that you see yourself.
If you are like most people, you believe that your attitude influences your actions more. The rationale is that if you feel good or empowered, you will take the steps necessary to have success. If you feel good and feel like doing what you must do, that will control your actions. While feelings have an effect for most people, the true Champion Performers in life don’t let their feelings dictate whether they will be successful or not. The true Champion Performers don’t allow feelings to influence what needs to get done each day. It’s like marriage. My husband and I were once asked how we were able to keep our marriage alive for 23+ years and I said the standard, “communication” and he responded with, “no, it’s commitment” You see there are days that we simply are not able to communicate effectively and yet we are committed to a specific outcome, “A successful marriage.” There are even days that we don’t feel like being with each other and yet we are committed to a good marriage. In other words, we take the actions necessary to produce the desired outcome and the attitude of a great marriage follows.
The key to success is using your actions to influence your attitude. When you discipline yourself to take the actions that you must take, your attitude will begin to come in line. Most of us in sales know what we need to do daily in terms of prospecting and lead follow-up. We know we need to take time to practice our skill or craft of sales. When we fail to do what we know we should do, our attitude is affected negatively. When we do what we know we should do, our attitude is affected positively. Your attitude and confidence will be thrust upward through disciplined action or activities.
In the end, your actions will influence your attitude more than your attitude will influence your actions.

Hello world!

September 28, 2009

Well world, here we go.

My very first blog post and I must say that I am very excited! You see, for so long I have put it off because I wasn’t sure how to go about it.

What changed my mind you ask? Great question! Recently I attended a Real Estate Bar camp in Sacramento and learned that it doesn’t have to be difficult. Yesterday I attended a Social Marketing and Networking class with Gene Rivers From Keller Williams. Gene and his team have helped over 3,000 happy homeowners since he has been in business and one of the ways that he communicates and assists his clients is through social media.

Gene has a 10 year old son that recorded a YouTube video to show the simplicity of it all so I guess the question to myself was… AM I SMARTER THAN A 5TH GRADER? LOL

Now that I have my first blog under my belt look forward to many more.

If you have great ideas that you would like to share about blogging, I’d love to hear them.